A Beautiful Memoir
Cockeyed: A Memoir
by Ryan Knighton
This is the best memoir I have read since J.R. Moeringer’s The Tender Bar. Knighton is a writer by profession and so this is just as much a beautifully crafted story as it is a story of a guy going blind. But even if it weren’t so masterfully written, this would still be a great book because of the material. Knighton began going blind in his teens due to retinitis pigmentosa. Now, at age 33, he has only 1% of his vision remaining. Cockeyed is the story of his life so far and it is at times hilarious, at times heartbreaking, but a page-turner from beginning to end.
I heard Knighton being interviewed on NPR a while back just after the book was published and immediately requested the book because his story was so compelling and he was so entertaining to listen to. The book follows suit beautifully. He describes his initial unawareness that he had a problem, moving towards denial that he had a problem, to eventually getting a cane, and so on. Some of Knighton’s stories are laugh out loud funny. Trying to find out where a bathroom is and being told “over there” he asks, “where is there?” He is told “at the back of the restaurant.” He asks, “where is the back?” “That way.” That’s not the exact dialogue, that’s just what I remember but you get an idea of how he is able to make fun of the way sighted people use language vaguely and often overuse phrases and metaphors related to vision. “Out of sight!” “See you around!”
At times, Knighton’s story is incredibly sad. His struggles to accept blindness are moving. His adventure teaching English in South Korea while faking vision is at first funny but increasingly sad as it negatively affects his relationship with his girlfriend and his own independence and confidence. The sudden, shocking death of his brother is a crucial moment in the book and it had me in tears.
Near the end of the book, Knighton tells the story of his visit to “blind camp” and this had me laughing so hard I was crying. He describes in detail the fire drill on the first day of camp - need I say more? He wonders why blind people aren’t better at communicating with each other. He describes a meal with blind people as similar to a scene from Taxi Driver with one person after another asking, “You talkin’ to me?” Knighton reflects that they should know better but then realizes that none of them are used to being around blind people. And then there is the scene where he helps his new blind camp buddy find his dentures. Just priceless.
Cockeyed is not only funny and moving, it is also philosophical at times and Knighton’s skill as a creative writer shines throughout the book. A wonderful book in every way, go get it from your library or bookstore today.
